This is going to be very different from my typical posts, but I believe it is absolutely necessary I talk about this. In a world full of the silent treatment from our most elite, transparency is an invaluable characteristic. I rarely ever formally apologize in writing, as I have been under the philosophy of actions speaking louder than words, but it is important to still document in words that you even are taking action.

What?

I'll cut the fluff and say right ahead what I have done. I have been under justified scrutiny for my inappropriate language over the past year, especially around peers significantly younger than me. There was absolutely no reason to have said what I've said, but that is what happened. The specifics of what I have said isn't going to be discussed, but it is absolutely unacceptable from any moral standing.

Why?

This section isn't meant to excuse this behavior, rather it serves as an explanation for transparency sake. Long story short, I have had a very dirty mouth ever since I was young and I haven't done much to improve on it. I didn't ever see it as a problem due to both being influenced by peers enabling it, and simply not knowing better. Now that I am a legal adult, I should know better. If I keep up my foul language there will absolutely be real world consequences lying right ahead of me.

Now what?

I have no way of proving that my words here are sincere, the only thing I can do to prove that is to never do this again. The unfortunate truth is that bad habits are difficult to stop, but it isn't impossible. I have only been clean since June of this year, which was the last time this occurred. That is an embarrassingly short time ago, but time is the ultimate healer, I can only move on from here. I am also seeking external help as my current psychiatrist hasn't been satisfying me as of lately. Mental health aid in the United States genuinely sucks.

I don't expect this post to magically make all hate towards me disappear, it is entirely understandable to disapprove of my actions. I am as disappointed as everyone else is, and have been hard on myself. Despite my self-hatred, I need to forgive myself as God has forgiven me. Repent my sins and start life anew.

Thanks to all who still see the good in me and continue to support me. I will not disappoint.

P.S. I hope you all have a great Christmas, for those who celebrate it.

EDIT 3/9/25:

It appears people are taking this incident and have been looking back at previous allegations and have been viewing them in a different lens, as if they suddenly became true. I would like to clarify that all screenshots are real, but the context given to them are false. I could go on all day about why this is true, but I don't have time to go into specifics. The specifics will only be delved into in the form of a legal document, which I hopefully won't have to do. For those who don't see this as sufficient, I want to remind you of the book of John:

But Thomas, one of the twelve, called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came.

The other disciples therefore said unto him, We have seen the Lord. But he said unto them, Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.

And after eight days again his disciples were within, and Thomas with them: then came Jesus, the doors being shut, and stood in the midst, and said, Peace be unto you.

Then saith he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing.

And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.

Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.

John 20:24-29, King James Version (KJV)